


I just wanna be in love with you

by Splashy



Series: Songfics [15]
Category: The Prom - Sklar/Beguelin/Martin
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Songfic, but like. light angst, nothing as angsty as some of my....other works, probably?, some angst too
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2020-04-28
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:14:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23886526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Splashy/pseuds/Splashy
Summary: Passing papers is a decent way to flirt, right?If I'm not forward, I can't possibly get hurt, right?I never trusted the idea of love at first sightso settle down
Relationships: Alyssa Greene/Emma Nolan
Series: Songfics [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/936072
Comments: 2
Kudos: 16





	I just wanna be in love with you

**Author's Note:**

> Heya I'm back
> 
> I have like, a million things to work on but instead I'm writing more songfics. This fic will be a collection of songfics. All of the songs are by mylifeisayolk/egg on YouTube. You can find her over [here!](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCG74-2jyAIFPo7HdUmLMWwA) Please check her out. She mainly does covers but released an EP in February. I listened to the songs and fell in love with them instantly and here I am now, a few hours later.

_Passing papers is a decent way to flirt, right?_  
_If I'm not forward, I can't possibly get hurt, right?_  
_I never trusted the idea of love at first sight_  
_so settle down_

Emma sits beside Alyssa in chemistry. Near the start of the year, their teacher had assigned lab partners and they were assigned together. She could still remember the pitiful looks Kaylee and Shelby had sent Alyssa, but Emma couldn’t help but admit she felt rather pleased getting to spend so much time with Alyssa. And it seemed like Alyssa liked it, too.

Their teacher was droning on about something. Emma wasn’t paying attention. She always did fine in this class, anyway. She was getting bored when she got an idea. She tore a piece of paper from her open notebook and quickly wrote a note on it.

Looking up to make sure the teacher wasn’t watching, she subtly - or at least tries to - slide the note over to Alyssa. Emma wants to watch as she reads it but forces herself to look ahead, pretending that she’s paying attention when really all her attention is focused on the girl beside her.

She’s rewarded with the sound of Alyssa trying and mostly failing to suppress a laugh. It causes her to smile at the sound, already picturing her wide grin. She glances at her out of the corner of her eye to see Alyssa smiling softly down at the note before lifting her gaze to look over at Emma. 

Their teacher turns around then and they quickly look back at him, Alyssa covering the note with her hand. She’s still smiling though, and Emma commits the sound and sight to heart.

She wishes she could do more than just pass notes, but she’s afraid. She’s afraid of getting hurt, so she stays silent. It’s safer this way.

_Is it weird I wanna be with you at midnight?_  
_I think you'd look especially lovely in the moonlight_  
_What am I saying_  
_I can't even get my words right_  
_When you're around_

Emma lays back in the bed of her truck, pressed against Alyssa. The air is chilly around them but she’s warm, the contact on her arm warming her everywhere.

They look out at the night sky, at the stars twinkling above them and the moon shining down. It illuminates Alyssa, and she thinks about how lovely she looks in the moonlight. She wishes she could tell her that, but she can’t bring herself to open her mouth.

She doesn’t want to make a fool of herself. She often struggles with stringing words together to form a coherent sentence when around Alyssa, especially when she looks like this in the moonlight. Instead, she commits the sight to memory, vowing to never forget how lovely she looks in the shining moonlight.

_Cause_  
_Smiles are my weakness and I think yours is the prettiest_  
_And you show it quite a bit when I'm with you_  
_It's almost entertaining how we're searching for the same thing_  
_But I would never try to see it through_

Alyssa turns to Emma and smiles at her. Emma can’t help but return it, though she’s almost stunned by how pretty Alyssa’s smile looks, especially when she’s still illuminated by the moonlight. 

She falls more in love with every smile directed her way. She wishes she could tell Alyssa how she feels, but she can never bring herself to say it.

She knows Alyssa’s a lesbian. She came out to her not long ago, and for a moment Emma let herself hope before telling herself it’s not worth it. She doesn’t want her heart to break. 

They both want the same thing, but she’s not sure if she’ll ever tell Alyssa about her crush.

_Yes I meant it when I said that you were pretty_  
_We never knew each other well and it's a pity_  
_Sometimes I wonder if when you hear 1950_  
_I come to mind_

She hadn’t meant to call Alyssa pretty, she had just blurted it out with little thought.

That’s not to say it wasn’t true, of course. Alyssa was very pretty, and if given the chance, Emma would tell her that every day. 

And, maybe she could. But she didn’t want to come on too strong. She didn’t want to scare Alyssa away. 

She wants to spend more time with Alyssa, but every moment she’s with her, she gets closer and closer to confessing everything and she’s scared of doing that. 

_I had the chance to tell the truth and still I hid it_  
_And I'm too much of a coward to admit it_  
_But I'd totally be down if you were interested_  
_In hanging out sometime_

There are so many moments where she comes so close to telling Alyssa everything. But she always holds herself back. She’s too much of a coward to say it, much as she wants to.

For now, she’s content with simply hanging out with Alyssa. She may want more, but she also loves simply spending time with her and wishes to do it as much as possible, even if being with her sometimes makes her heart hurt.

She may want to be with Alyssa, but she also doesn’t want to make things awkward between them if things don’t go well. So she stays silent, just being with Alyssa.

_Cause_  
_Smiles are my weakness and I think yours is the prettiest_  
_And you show it quite a bit when I'm with you_  
_It's almost entertaining how we're searching for the same thing_  
_But I would never try to see it through_

And being with Alyssa is one of her favorite things, second only to Alyssa herself. Seeing Alyssa’s smile always lights up Emma’s day.

And she seems to smile a lot when they’re together. Emma does whatever she can to get Alyssa to smile or to laugh, relishing the sight and the sound and knowledge that _she_ caused that. 

Even if she and Alyssa never become more than friends, at least Emma knows she can make Alyssa laugh and smile. And that’s good enough for her.

_It's 5am, I'm in my room_  
_I don't intend on telling you_  
_That I haven't slept_  
_Cause I've been writing this all night_

Emma sits at the desk in her room, hunched over it, and writing in a notebook covered in her writing. She’s buried in her writing but as she writes the final line, she takes a breath and leans back.

She runs her hand over her hair as she uses her other hand to check the time on her phone. She pauses and frowns when she realizes it’s 5am. She hadn’t meant to stay up this late working on this. She looks back over her writing, fixing a line or two here and there, wanting - _needing_ \- for it to be absolutely perfect. 

She’ll be exhausted at school in the morning, but she has no regrets. She just has to make sure she avoids telling Alyssa why she was up so late and therefore why she’s so tired.

_Your picture staring from the shelf_  
_You have me questioning myself_  
_What's gotten into me?_  
_I thought I was alright_  
_But_

Emma looks back at her phone, turning it on and looking at her lock screen. It was Alyssa, taken not long ago. She’s laughing and Emma smiles, thinking of the memory. They had gone out to get ice cream and somehow Alyssa had gotten a bit on her nose. When Alyssa wiped it off, Emma took to trying to get ice cream back on her nose. And her cheek, and her forehead, and wherever she could reach.

It resulted in a giggly Alyssa, partially covered in ice cream, and Emma had to get a picture of it, to immortalize this moment she never wanted to forget. 

As she looks at the photo, she can’t help but wonder what’s gotten into her. She never expected to be writing a song for Alyssa, and yet here she is, staying up until dawn doing just that. And she wouldn’t want it any other way.

_Smiles are my weakness and I think yours is the prettiest_  
_I wish I wouldn't be so shy around you_  
_And I never expected myself to be so affected_  
_After so much time of doing fine_  
_Without you_

For the longest time, Emma was fine on her own. Before she was outed, she had a few friends, sure. She was never too close to them, but they’d hang out after school sometimes and she always had someone she could be partnered with in an assignment if the need ever came. 

But after she was outed, she was left alone. And it hurt, for the longest time. She was just starting to heal, to be alright, when Alyssa came into her life. And after that moment, it seemed like everything changed. It all became so much better because now she had Alyssa.

And now that they’re friends, she can’t stop thinking about her. Her smile, her laugh, her voice, her everything. And Emma may feel a little shy around her, but it never lasts long. She’s never felt more comfortable around anyone else. 

She doesn’t know how this happened. She never expected this to happen, for her to become so affected by Alyssa. But she wouldn’t trade it for anything else.

_Passing papers is a decent way to flirt, right?_  
_If I'm not forward, I can't possibly get hurt, right?_  
_I never trusted the idea of love at first sight, so settle down_

Emma writes a little note on a piece of paper before flicking it over to Alyssa. She waits, refusing to look at her, as the girl reads it. At her laughter she badly suppresses, Emma smiles softly. 

She never believed in love at first sight, but maybe. Just maybe.

This one time, it could be real.


End file.
